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Introduction

“Pain is something to master, not wallow in.”

Anais Nin

I was the bitter baby mama. I wore my hurt, bitterness and anger like a badge of honor. It was cloaked under makeup, designer clothes, degrees, accolades, excess weight and my all-time favorite, religion. I was struggling to navigate the effects of a childhood trauma that left me wounded and in pain. This unhealed pain eventually manifested in the relationships I had with men. I became intensely and intimately involved with f**k boys. They were the hurt that hurt so good. That was until I was just left with the hurt. I’ve been cheated on and humiliated. I’ve been physically, emotionally and verbally abused. But I’ve also laughed until my stomach hurt and felt butterflies. I was supported, cared for, rescued and taken to depths of physical pleasure that left me speechless. While the bad was really bad, the good with these f**k boys was also really good. But I wasn’t satisfied with a mix of both good and bad. I wanted only the good in my future relationships. I decided that I was going to manifest the man of my dreams and live the life with him that I imagined. I made the choice to stop recycling the same relationship with different f**k boys. I didn’t know if it was possible, but I was determined to find out.

In 2017, I came face to face with my kindred spirit in the Buffalo Airport. I was a nervous wreck waiting for him and I thought I was going to throw up. We had been talking on the phone non-stop for 2 months and I was finally going to meet him in person. When we finally saw each other and hugged, it was at that moment I knew he was IT. Here he was, my wildest hopes and dreams in the flesh. And a fine ass one with muscles at that. And he loved me. All of me. After everything I had been through in my past relationships, I believed I was too damaged to be any man’s first choice. What I failed to realize was the power of being healed and whole. My commitment to personal growth and self-healing allowed me to meet a man who chose me.

I transitioned from a man telling me that he would kill me and walk out the door like nothing had ever happened, to a man telling me he wasn’t going anywhere, no matter what happens. This would not be possible if I had not done the work outlined in this book. Following the 10 strategies, steps or concepts (whichever you prefer), in this book will begin your journey to becoming f**k boy free and attract the man of your dreams. But first you must find yourself. Your true self that is. The woman hidden and buried underneath the false reality of who you think you are or who you’ve been told to be. The woman buried beneath the pain and struggles of the past.  Once you find yourself, then your kindred spirit will find you. It is my prayer and affirmation that as you read this book you will pull on the self-love and courage that is always present within to radically change your life. It is my prayer and affirmation that you will decide to never stop pursuing your deepest desires. I believe so many of us are afraid to express how much we want to be loved by a man. And there is nothing wrong with that. We were wired to be loved and protected. To deny that is to deny who you are as a woman. This denial causes us to settle for half-ass love from f**k boys. In my opinion, some love ultimately means no love. What we mistake for love is really an attachment. Love and attachment are not the same.

Each chapter ends with an exercise that will help bring the concepts to fruition in your life. Although not always easy to implement, the strategies are simple. They are a normal and natural part of being a woman. I was working on implementing the 10 concepts I discuss in this book for 3 years before I met my kindred spirit. Within those three years I dated two men. Each man showed fewer and fewer f**k boy tendencies. This demonstrated that I was on the right path. I knew I was getting closer to meeting the “one”. I would encourage you to date, practice the concepts, test them out, learn from your mistakes and learn from the men you date. They are a reflection of you.

Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your journey! Thank you for allowing me to impart into your life! Love and light to you all. Love and light…

 

 

“You will be someone’s best thing”

r.h. Sin

About the Author

Kathleen is a Certified Holistic Nutritionist, Certified Nutrition and Wellness Consultant, Certified Vaginal Steam Facilitator, and Certified Yin Yoga Instructor. Carrying with her the wisdom of self-healing and radical self-love, she is committed to showing others that given the right conditions, the body, mind and emotions can be healed.